Traveling with Your Partner

I met my husband in a very romantic way, at the theatre after a live performance that he was acting in when I asked about volunteering after the show and was directed to him. It was a show full of emotion and as an audience member I was vibrating high levels of happiness, curiosity, and excitement. I drew him in at that vibration and when I stood in front of him, I knew I had to spend more time with him, and so we did.

Things were going well, and because I only had a short term visa in Australia, I had to leave the country to apply for a student visa to return. He decided to come with me to Thailand for a few weeks and go on this adventure. It didn’t even cross my mind until later that there was a definite possibility that I would not have been granted the visa which showed by the single bag I brought along for our travels.

In all relationships you have to travel in some form, even if it’s walking to the car together, or going to do something, anything really. Most of my relationships have involved proper travel of getting on an airplane and landing in a whole new place, or driving for hours on end to reach someplace cool.

The process of traveling really allows for true colours to come shining out. I have broken off relationships just before a major travel due to the way something had happened in the last traveling time. I have had crazy silent road trip experiences where the other person had slept the wrong way and was just in a horrible mood and making sure everyone around also felt terrible. I have had amazing experiences reaching highs of highs like seeing the beloved Chicago Cubs play in Wrigley Field, or dancing all day and night until I passed out asleep at festivals back in my tent.

Heading out and traveling with my partner to Thailand is what sealed the deal for me. I can be so totally flexible with travel plans that it will make someone who wants to be anywhere at a certain time the worst person to travel with me. I like to intuitively follow what attracts my attention and flow with the energy of the place to feel where I need to be. The only thing that is certain is that I can never get overly hungry, because that throws the over sensory experience overboard for me, so when I’m hungry I MUST eat right then. One of the first phrases after hello that I learned when I moved to Brazil was “eu sou com fome” which translates to “I am hungry”, because this is a state that I must take care of when it arises.

Anyhow, in Thailand he was the easiest going travelling partner I have ever travelled with in my entire life. This was beyond any family member, beyond any girlfriend, any boyfriend, any anyone. He didn’t mind if we suddenly when left when I said we might end up going right, he didn’t mind if we at 10 in the morning or 10 at night, he was up for absolutely everything and anything. He went in for Thai massages with me even though he is someone who very much only likes a soft massage which is the opposite of a Thai massage where they use a lot of pressure with each movement. He even got his hair done with me at a Thai salon and enjoyed every minute of it.

It amazed me that he was so open to flowing while traveling, that it showed me that this must be what he’s like in general when away from his main duties at his family farm, and what it would be like when it would be just us creating our lives together.

We took this trip early on, just over six months into dating, and we have just celebrated our nine year anniversary together. So much life has happened since that trip in Thailand, but he has remained someone who accepts life and goes with it while also remaining stable in our relationship.

The thing is that so many times in relationships when I was younger, I would get a feeling like it wasn’t right, like some red flag would be raised about how they ate, or how they weren’t as nice to the serving staff, or a snarky comment that seemed harmless but really wasn’t, and I would shake it off, and project that it wasn’t really how they were, only to realise later that is exactly who they were. By time I had met my now husband, I had started to clearly see myself, I had traveled alone, I had lived alone, I had intentionally developed so that when we met, and became exclusive in our relationship, everything flowed. I wasn’t expecting him to be anything other than who he was, and he allowed me to be who I am without trying to change me, which is exactly who I want to be in a relationship with.

So next time you have a chance to do any kind of traveling alone, or with someone else, keep an eye out on how you react, what makes you comfortable or uncomfortable, what needs you have, and try to identify them. Next time you have the chance to travel with your partner, see how they travel and if that is compatible and if you feel the goodness flow the way you want it to, keep going.